The Real Meaning
by claary.x
Summary: What did Jace really mean when he said 'To Love is to destroy, and to be loved is to be the one destroyed? All set after the 6th & final book.  Rated T for laungage. R&R


I know a lot of people have written stories _like this_, but I wanted this one to be different. In TMI, the only thing that matters to Jace is Clary, and it seems for there to be no real relationship with anyone before her. Now this is Jace we are talking about, drop dead sexy Jace, so *technically* I thought had should have at least 'done the deed', and I wanted to tell a story, about why Jace really thinks _to love is to be destroyed, and to be loved is to be the one destroyed. _So, this is after the final TMI book, and Sebastian is there, along with Izzy and Simon together. And Maia and Jordan and what not.

Katt looked down, clutching her hands to her stomach.

"No. This can't be right" she hissed. Katt had never been one to be sad, only angry, and right now, she was angry. _Angry enough to break something, _Katt thought, throwing her hand into the mirror above the sink, it smashing, and the glass raining down on her in silvering pieces, some of it dust, some of it not. She looked down at her hand, admiring it with an amused expression. She carefully picked out a few shards of glass, before picking here stele up and drawing an_ iratze. _Katt swore, and began packing up her stuff, occasionally shaking things out (like her toiletries bag) and putting other things in the bin (her toothbrush) because of glass in them. Once she had collected all her stuff, she began to pack up her other stuff, her clothes, books, photos, weapons and some other small things. _Knock, knock_. Katt looked at the door.

"Come in" she hissed, her voice barely audible, as she stared at the door. _Jace. _Jace walked in, his blonde hair in his face, sweat across his face.

"Babe. Is everything ok?" he looked confused. "You missed training. You know, you will get in trouble if you skip things like this" he laughed. "You're only fifteen, you got a long way to go".

"Exactly. Im fifteen Jace. Fifteen and pregnant. And that's your fault. I'm leaving. Now, the goddamned best you can do is help me pack" Katt said, her eyes widening slightly, but then narrowing, full of anger. All Jace did was stand there, not talking, not moving, but looking shocked. "Fine. Be a lazy shit. As usual!" Katt, gathering the rest of her things together, one eye on Jace, one eye on what she was doing. She put everything in her suitcase, slamming the lid, dragging it to the door, then walking over to Jace, who was standing there, ten minutes later in the same position. Katt leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. "Your love has destroyed me, so I hope you are destroyed" she whispered in his ear, before walking out.

…

Jace tossed and turned, before finally waking up. He could feel the sweat dripping off his hand, and the thin cotton sheet cocooning and Clary together. He got up, pulling himself away from the sheets, and from Clary, walking out the door in his silky black boxes. At times like these, Jace wanted to read, and there was only one thing that would help, _Assassins of the Night. _'Assassins of the Night' was a FictionPress story, which had been posted by Katt. Jace didn't remember how he had found it, but he had been searching online for Katt, and it had come up. He knew it had been her straight away, the story line so close to Shadowhunters, her writing style, but most of all, the names. After Katt had left, he had found a list of names in her draw, and all of those names happened to be in the online story. It was only a chapter long, and had remained that way for months, but it had been something, something almost touchable, a connection to her. Jace walked into the library, logging onto the laptop they had bought for Clary. He sighed, wondering how Katt had found out about laptops and what not. It all confused him, but Katt had always been smart, he had known that, and regretted ignoring it.

"Jace? Your phone is ringing". It was Clary, standing at the door of the libaray, clutching his iPhone, Santana's _She's not there_ playing. He got up, snatching it out of her hands. _Its her ringtone. Katt, _he thought. Jace could feel it vibrating in his hands. It _was _her. Looking down at the caller ID, Jace began to shake with the phone.

"Who is it?" Clary asked. "You already have three missed calls from them". Clary looked concerned.

"Answer it for me. Please." Jace said, looking at her, his eyes scared, and full of guilt. The phone began to ring again, as Clary plucked it from his hands, putting it to her ear.

"Yes. This is Jace Wayland's phone, but he prefers to go by Lightwood now" Clary said, looking at Jace, before putting the phone to her neck. "Jace, this chick wants to talk to you" she said, looking at him as he shook his head. "No. Sorry, he can't talk right now. Can I take a message?" her eyes went big. "Ok, ok. Chill!" she said, before almost throwing the phone at him.

"Yes" he whisperd.

"_Jace." _Katt hissed down the line. "I am at JFK airport. I want a pick up now."

` "Ok." He said, hanging up, and dropping the phone. "Clary, go get Izzy and Alec. _Please_" Jace begged, sliding to his knees as Clary hurried out. _Why is she hear? Why now? I just begin to forget about her, move on. Now she is back, _Jace thought. He felt a tap on his shoulder, Alec. He looked up to see Izzy and Alec's faces looking down at him.

"Is it?" Izzy asked, her eyes were large and round, full of concern. He nodded. "What does she want?" Izzy asked, a certain spark coming into her eyes.

"A pickup. From JFK." He whispered, sliding his phone into his pocket.

"I'll go. Izzy, go tell Mom." Alec said, walking swiftly out the door. Clary bent down beside Jace, pulling him into her arms.

"What's wrong? Please tell me Jace." She said slowly, picking her words carfully. Jace just shook his head lightly.

"Clary. You need to go. We can't have you hear when this happens." Izzy said, taking her hand and walking out. "Go to your room. Stay there Clary. Don't come out until I get you" she said, pushing her and in closing the door before walking to her parents room. Izzy knocked on the door. "Mom?" she said walking in. Her mother was sitting on top of her bed, reading.

"Yes Issabelle?" she asked, her blue eyes looking at her over the top of the book.

"Katt is back". It was all that needed the be said, Maryse quickly jumping out of bed.

"I understand. Go to Jace. Your brother needs you" she said, ushering her out the door. Izzy turned around to say something to her mother, but was cut off by the door slaming in her face, she swore, and started walking in the direction of the elevator. She knew Jace would live, he was tough.

"Alec. I missed you. Seriously! Now tell me about Magnus!" Isabelle could hear voices down the hall, Alec and Katt. _That was quick…._Izzy thought, as a pair of hands came up and grabbed her around her ribs, making her scream.

"Izzy! Chill! Just me!" Alec laughed as she turned around, to see Katt smiling broadly at her. She was clutching something in her arms.

"Katt."

"Isabelle" she said, her smile fading. Izzy had one raised eyebrow, and looked pissed.

"How dare you, walk out on me. You left me with a bunch of boys, and I became conceited and a bitch!" she giggled, before starting to take her in a hug when Katt jumped back. "Oh. Sorry. Is that?" Izzy asked as Sieanna nodded.

"My baby boy. Little Asha Callum De Luca" she said smiling, cradling the bundle to her chest. "I actually need to put him somewhere, it's been a long day." She said, her voice turning to a whisper, and the bundle moved slightly.

"Sure" Izzy said quietly, leading all three of them to a room with a cot and a double bed. " Put him down there?" Izzy said with a wink.

"Thankyou" Katt said, laying baby Asha down, and then kissing his forehead. "Im sure you will all get to know him later" she said, walking out of the room, closing it behind her.

"So we go see him now?" Alec asked, raising and eyebrow.

"Yes. It's about time" Katt said.

"Wait, wait, and wait. Tell me one thing, why did you come back?" Izzy said, grabbing Katt and Alec's wrists before they could walk any further.

"I was fifteen and pregnant. I left for a reason, and now, it's time my baby meets his father." she said, pulling out of Izzy's grip and walking to the library, Alec and Izzy hot at her heels.

"Just a warning Katt, he has a girlfriend" Alec said, sliding in front of the library door, before Katt could open it. She raised an eyebrow, before pushing Alec aside and walking into the library.


End file.
